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Sailor’s mom comes to school for picture day

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Would you just take the friggin picture mom!?!

Sailor’s mom comes to school for picture day

Pensacola, FL. Class 204627 recently completed their course of training at NATTC Pensacola. This group of young heroes will soon depart for their permanent duty stations. However one last piece of business must be finished…CLASS PICTURES. Seaman Airman Todd “The Todd” Hammerschmidt, was born in raised in nearby Alabama. It’s just a short ride to the base for his mom Dorothy Hammerschmidt. Upon hearing of her son’s passing grade she was beyond excited; “He never did well in school. Frankly he barely graduated. I’m so happy that I finally don’t have to worry about my big boy”.

Getting onto a military installation is no easy feat. One must have good reason for being there. “No amount of security will stop me from seeing my boy graduate. No amount”, said Mrs. Hammerschmidt. Military Police working the front gate received a barrage of “you can’t keep me out”, and “I pay your salary, you son of a bitch” from the anxious mother. A quick phone call to the base commander got the job done; “Ohh Admiral Bob? He goes to my church. We’re good friends. I had to call him and let him know that gate guards weren’t being very polite”.

Word of hurricane Dorothy quickly spread throughout the base. The Master Chief in charge of the ATC school house quickly jumped into action. “I want this picture shit done quickly, and I want your mom out of my school house! You got that airman?”, said the angry Master Chief to the now terrified seaman airman.

Upon her arrival at the ATC school, she quickly ran up to the poor graduate and kissed him on the cheek. “Now come on, I wanna see your classroom, and your teachers, and your friends…I wanna see everything”. “Mom, can we please just take the picture, and you can go back home?”. “I didn’t drive all the way here to just take a picture and leave! What is it? Are you embarrassed by me? Am I not good enough for your classy NAVY base?”. “No mom, God. I just have a lot to do today.” “Is someone bullying you? Tell me who they are. I know that Admiral”.

The poor young man gets weak in the knees, and almost faints. He manages to regain his composure and does something he never expected. “God damn it mom. Just take the fucking picture and leave. I don’t have time for your shit right now!”. Dorothy is stunned. No one has talked to her like that since her ex-husband (Todd’s father). “Well, I guess you’ve finally become just like your father”. “Just take the picture please”, he says.

The distraught mother takes the picture, as everyone in the room wishes they were somewhere else. Only the Marines in his class remain completely at ease with all the drama. “Shit man, my mom is way worse than that”, says Lance Corporal Mike Sullivan. It’s unknown at this time, if Todd is welcome at his mom’s house for Christmas. We’ll bring you more on this story as it develops.

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