Home ATC Memes Originals Gulfstream pilots are the Axe Body Spray of aviation…Part 2

Gulfstream pilots are the Axe Body Spray of aviation…Part 2

Gulfstream 525

So, I say to the guy; “Look man, you’re being a real creep. Can you just tone it down?”. No sooner do the words leave my mouth, the lady hits King Douche over the head with a brick. “Ohh my God. What the hell are you doing?” I say to her. She looks shocked at my question. “I thought you were about to make a move. I was trying to back you up.” she says. I kneel down by his lifeless body; “Man he doesn’t look so good. I think you fucking killed him”. “Ohh damn, not again!” she says. “Again?” I ask. “Nothing. I mean, I haven’t ever killed anyone before is what I mean”, she says. “No, what the hell did you mean by “AGAIN”? What the heck have I gotten myself into?”. “Let’s just leave it all in the past. We have to get rid of the body.”, she says as she grabs his feet. “Come on, grab his arms. We’ll move the body over there, behind that shed. No one goes over there. Later tonight, we’ll come back and move it someplace else”. I grab his hands and start to do as she says. I suddenly stop, and drop the body; “Wait! Why are we moving the body? Why do we have to get rid of it? Can’t we just tell the police that he was assaulting you or something?”. “Yeah, great plan. They got forensic shit man. They can tell that he was struck from behind. It’ll look like you and I murdered him, which is basically what happened”. “No, not basically…It’s WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!”, I say. “Look dude, you’re still living in the past. The past has no future. Let’s get this guy out of sight, and we can talk more about it”. I hesitantly agree. With each moment that passes, I strangely become more comfortable with this reality.

We get the body hidden between some bushes, and the old work shed. My shirt is drenched in sweat. She’s completely calm. No sweat, and not a hair on her head is out of place. She’s stoic, and in a strange way, looking kind of hot. I mean, I should hate her. It’s because of her that I’m most likely going to prison, but I gotta say…all the action has got me kinda turned on. I quickly dismiss that thought, and get back to the task at hand. “People know he was here. It’s going to be suspicious that he just left” I say. “No it won’t. He wasn’t even flying today. He was just in here to hit on the girls, and pick on other pilots. He does that shit all the time”. I become a little more at peace with killing this guy. “What do we do next?” I ask. “We’ll both go back inside. I’ll tell everyone that you punked that guy out, and then you and I made out”.Β Continue to part 3



  1. […] I begin the long walk towards the back door. What am I gonna say? “Hey Gulfstream Guy…take your damn hands off her”? Nah, that’s too much like George McFly. “Hey Siri, remind me to watch Back to the Future later”. “You got it. I will remind you to watch Back to the Future later”. Thanks Siri, now it’s time to go kick some ass. I open the door…not slowly like a little pussy, but not too hard…I mean if that lady is standing near the door, I don’t want to hurt her. As I open the door I hear the Douche; “I mean at first I was worried that it was ball cancer or something, but after a couple of weeks I realized it was just an ingrown hair”. I round the door and see the lady smoking a cigarette, and the Douche standing awkwardly close to her. “What’s up chief?”, he says to me. I look at her. Her eyes scream “Get me away from this guy”.Β Continue reading Part two… […]

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