ATC Memes
ATCer asks woman’s dad for her hand in marriage
The following is the letter I sent my ex-wife’s dad asking him for her hand in marriage. I look back at that time in my life, and am astonished at how self aware I was. Ultimately the marriage didn’t work out. Anyway, here it is. ***The names have been changed to protect that asshole ex-wife of mine (actually it’s because I just don’t wanna hear her shit).***
Dear Mr. Smith,
I’d like to start off by telling you how much I love your daughter. For me, the sun rises and sets with her. I’m writing to ask you for her hand in marriage. Wait until I have finished before you make your decision.
I have just been hired as an Air Traffic Controller. I will soon make more than enough money to support her, as well as our growing family. I will buy her a nice big house and always have food on the table. This I promise you.
Things will be good for the first few years. I will regularly take her out to expensive dinners, and shower her with love and attention. The vacations will be extravagant, and I’ll even buy her that Range Rover she’s always wanted. I will be the mark that all husbands are measured by.
After those first few years pass, she will get lazy and gain some weight. It wouldn’t be a major issue, if not for the fact that around this time, the blow jobs will stop, and sex will become infrequent. Once the baby is born, I won’t get the level of ass that I’m used to. I’ll hold the line though, because after all, I will have gained a few pounds, and I don’t eat her box as is.
I’ll be forced to look elsewhere to get the poison out of my system. I’ll soon start banging a chick that I work with. She won’t even be that good looking. The fact that she is “Work Hot” and is giving me attention, will be enough. I’ll grow even more distant as the new relationship progresses. Your daughter will grow suspicious and pick fights with me almost daily.
After it becomes too much to bear, she will take the kid, and come to stay at your house for a while…”to figure things out”. I’ll protest, but it will be an act. I’ll really want the freedom to see my side piece whenever I like.
Eventually she will get the courage to file for divorce, and this sham marriage will come to an end. It will have been born of love, but will end in acrimony. She will take half of my pay, and get a large piece of both my pension and 401-K. She’ll live with you for years…right in the twilight of your own retirement. Read on for the conclusion
